Sunday, December 9, 2012

Suburbia Comes to Life

     Many years ago, before the white man had ever penetrated the deep black heart of the African continent, There lived there a great and powerful creature, rarely seen by any but the unlucky. On the plains of the Serengeti, there is fierce competition for food and other resources, only the big can survive. Their ancestors may have migrated down from the Indus  near the end of the last ice age, probably the wattle and daub huts of the indigenous people there. But in the hot jungles and plains of Africa, these pitiful hovels flourished and grew, some quite a bit. Vasco de Gama Recorded in a ships log that he swears he saw, a triple bed, double bath, complete with entertainment center and white picket fence grazing by the coast as he sailed past.
     These creatures which I speak of are of course the wild Suburban Household. Until their domestication in the early 1950's, these neo-eclectic homes and ranches ran rampant in the African continent, destroying villages grain supplies and quite often trampling people and animals to death. Contrary to popular belief, the near extinction of the White Rhino was not from over hunting  but from  territorial disputes with a clan of Bungalows with attached car ports.
     Once Americans found that these great and majestic creatures could be tamed and made to serve lifetimes, they quickly depopulated Africa's thick jungles and rolling plains. I, myself, would never want to be a Mcmansion, Wild or domesticated, but to talk to one of them, learn the history of the tribe would be quite interesting, if only to see what the average Joe thinks about a bunch of people living inside him.

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